What is a Gorean Free Woman?

 

 

I believe that a Gorean free woman should, first of all, be committed to living by Gorean principles, philosophies, tenets, ideals, etc, just like anyone calling themselves Gorean.

• She should understand and revel in the fact that she is equal (in worth, and almost in status) to, but not the SAME as a man.

Yes, she may well be more capable in many areas, than many men, and some women may even be more capable than the average man at some of the things at which men more commonly excel, but she should not spend her life trying to prove it.

• As a woman, she graciously and gracefully encourages, empowers, and entrusts the men around her to be men, without constantly challenging them just because she CAN. She knows her individual strengths and weaknesses and puts them to use in a way that is beneficial, not just to herself, but to her family and community, and complementary to the men in her life.

• She never attempts to emasculate men; Even if they deserve it or seem to be doing a good job of it themselves, she does not dignify it with her notice .

This isn't to say that she will cover their asses for them if they do it to themselves, nor will she compromise her own honour or integrity to help someone else save face, but she will be supportive to those in her community who are deserving of such.

• She never hides or is ashamed of her femaleness, but rather celebrates it, with pride!

Here on Earth, in real life, we do not have to choose between being frigid, seemingly sexless, inert creatures, or being enslaved.
I believe that what Norman was really trying to point out with his extremes between frigid, haughty, shrill, tedious FW, and joyous, licking slaves, was that there is a balance.. That, as is stated a few times throughout the books, there is some of the slave and some of the FW in all women. I really think this is true, and that we should not hide who we are for the sake of convention.

• She enjoys being treated as a lady, being protected, cared for, and nurtured, having bags, boxes, doors and chairs held or carried for her...

Even though she can do all those things for herself, and does not NEED a man to do them for her, she does not see it as an insult or a condescending act, but rather, a tribute to her womanhood. By the same token, her gracious acceptance of such things is a tribute to their manhood.

• She understands and accepts, gracefully, the fact that somewhere out there, there is a man, or men, who is her "natural master", and that, if she ever meets one of them, she will have no honest recourse but to take her place at his feet.

In summary:

• We are female, and proud of all that entails.
• We are strong. We do not compromise ourselves, our values, our honour, or our fellows.
• We do not pretend to be anything we are not, nor do we pretend not to be anything we are.

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*More of my thoughts on what it is to be a Gorean FW can be found here.

From the perspective of a former slave....

 I do realize that there are those who will never see me as a free woman because I was once a slave. I have already encountered a so-called "master", who presumed to order me to tell the girls who were addressing me properly that I was "no mistress" and, when I politely told him that I would not, as I was a free woman, he chastised those poor girls for "answering to a slave", and proclaimed my actions and words as "a girl's bullshit".

That is fine. I know who and what I am, and will not try to hide my past. I will celebrate, fully, the woman I am with no apologies and with pride. My time in the collar has helped me to learn what it is to be a woman and, indeed, has prepared me for being a BETTER free woman than I was before the collar.

I now know myself as a woman, and am happy to be so. No, I am not weak, by any stretch of the imagination, and there are few people, male or female, who can physically overpower me, but I no longer feel the need to constantly PROVE that. I enjoy letting men be men and not challenging them constantly, like I once did. I enjoy being treated as a lady, being protected, cared for, and nurtured, having bags, boxes, doors and chairs held or carried for me. Of course, I can do all those things for myself, and do not NEED a man to do them for me, however, I no longer see it as an insult or a condescending act, but rather, a tribute to my womanhood. And my gracious acceptance of such things is a tribute to their manhood. We are not the same, and that is beautiful!

Sure, sometimes I have more of my "male energy" going on, and in those times, I am more masculine than feminine, but I have learned that I do not have to hide any part of myself. And that does not negate the fact that I am a woman. I never would have come this far, if not for my years as a slave.

These are all things I may never have learned, had I not spent time as a slave. And, in fact, the books are full of examples of haughty, horrid free women who, after a period of enslavement and subsequent freedom, were the epitome of what a noble, Gorean, free woman ought to be!

So, yes. I was a slave and was happy and proud to have been one.

Now, I am free, and am happy and proud to be a free woman.

Those who accept that, welcome to this part of my journey. Those who cannot.. I have no words for, as they are not worth my time.

I hope that my path and my experiences can help others who may be on a similar path.. Perhaps my words can light the way, or even warn someone off that particular path. It doesn't matter to me, so long as my story is beneficial to someone!

Who are the true slaves.. FW or slaves?

 

This question was posed recently on one of the forums I am on, and I thought I would share my response here.
The question, in paraphrase, cited the fact that Gorean FW are constrained by "chains" of their station, forcing them to hide their true selves, as opposed to slaves, who, not only are not so constrained, but, in fact, MUST be completely open.

I think much depends on whether one is referring to the FW of the books, or those in real life. If the former, then, certainly, many of them wear, perhaps, the heaviest of chains.. Those of the denial of their true nature.
They are forbidden to show any nuance of "slave-like behaviour", lest they be fully enslaved. That may work in the fiction, but in reality, it is absurd! The FW of the books are, in their way, no more "free" than the average Earth woman!

You see, I agree with the idea that, in each woman, there is some slave and some free woman. Of course, how much of each is going to vary widely from woman to woman, but I do think that the vast majority of (straight) women will joyfully kneel before the right man, even if only behind closed doors.

That does not mean, however, (contrary to what the books seem to suggest, within the stories) that ALL women are cut out for slavery. In fact, I maintain that most are absolutely NOT! Despite the romantic ideal, where, time and time again, all it takes is a sufficient amount of violence to render a former FW into a joyfully licking, begging slave, most people prefer freedom. Goreans especially!

That said, here in reality, it is my belief that Gorean free women are more truly free than those in the books.
We know ourselves to be women.
We know that, in general, we are naturally more submissive than men.
We know that our femininity is something to be celebrated, relished, and cherished.. not hidden away as though it were some shameful secret.
We know that there is always the possibility that someday, some man will come along who will bring us to our knees at his feet, merely by being what he is.. A man. A TRUE man, and one who will master us.. heart, body, mind and soul, without even trying.
And we accept these facts with grace and decorum.
Unlike our fictional counterparts though, we are not forced to hide those delicious stirrings that we may feel.. for there is no risk of being summarily stripped and collared for the "crime" of being fully female.
We must only submit to those men who cause our own natures to demand it of us.