What do I mean by, "Sensual"?

Sensual, in my vernacular anyway, should not be confused with sexual.

When I say I want sensual touch, sensual massage, or sensual play, I am not asking you to start groping my nipples or making a beeline for my pussy.

When I agree to include sensual touch when I top or massage you, that doesn't mean I'm going to give you a handjob or finger you.

sen·su·al [sen-shoo-uhl] adjective
pertaining to, inclined to, or preoccupied with the gratification of the senses or appetites; carnal; fleshly.
arousing or exciting the senses or appetites.
of or pertaining to the senses or physical sensation; sensory.

When I say sensual, I mean running hands through hair, caresses that go from light to firm, full contact to almost a tickle or flutter, to the light scrape of fingernails, or perhaps even what feels like it must have cut, even though it didn't, running differently textured materials across flesh (silk, fur, leather, textured gloves, a brush, feathers, etc), playing with different temperatures, maybe touching some sensuous food to one's lips, like chocolate or strawberries. I mean things that awaken, arouse, excite, titillate, and gratify the senses. All of them!
I mean touching the back, arms, legs, belly, neck, and so on.

Will it feel good?
I sure hope so!

Will it be sexy?
Probably!

Will you/I get off?
Maybe, but that isn't the point or goal.

Sure, sensual can often lead to or be a part of sexual, but it is not a given, and should never be assumed without prior negotiation!

And even if sex and/or sexual touch is in the cards, the skin is the body's largest organ, and the entire surface of it contains erogenous zones! Too often, the majority of that skin is neglected, as people go straight for the "goal". This means that we miss out on worlds of sensation and pleasure. For me, sexual and sensual encounters both are a journey, meant to be fully enjoyed, rather than some goal based activity where orgasm and/or ejaculation are the main event and be all, end all.

Alan Watts said:

"When we make music we don't do it in order to reach a certain point, such as the end of the composition. If that were the purpose of music then obviously the fastest players would be the best. Also, when we are dancing we are not aiming to arrive at a particular place on the floor as in a journey. When we dance, the journey itself is the point, as when we play music the playing itself is the point."

I look at sensuality and sex the same way.

Pewdipie plays South Park - The Stick of Truth

I watched all of these, and it's completely awesome and hilarious! I want to play this game now!

Playing with me - Things you should know

Since I get a lot of requests for play, and often, the same questions come up, I figured I'd post something informational, which explains a great deal about who I like to play with, how I like to play, and what people can expect from playing with me.
I'm a switch. That means I enjoy both topping and bottoming, serving and being served.
Don't let this confuse you though... I'm not an "equal opportunity" switch.
Different people bring out different sides of me. That's just the way it is.
I play with people of all gender identifications/non identifications, but the ways I play with male/female/other identifying people differ. No, this is not "fair". I play for my enjoyment and fulfilment, not as a public service for equality. Deal with it or go play with someone else.

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As a bottom:

I like to get worked over thoroughly from time to time, and have a list of things I love over here. If I'm bottoming, as opposed to submitting, It's going to be a lot more about what I want than what you want to do to me. Yes, I will cheerfully (well, mostly LOL) take a couple strikes, lashes, pokes, or whatever "for you", and we can negotiate things so we both get our needs/wants met. That's only fair, but I won't really be obedient or docile or any of that, most likely.

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As a submissive:

It takes a very specific sort of person to trigger my submissive side. Women rarely do, but it has been known to happen on occasion.
My submission can not be demanded. That just doesn't work. If you decide to go all "domly" on me without my having indicated any sort of deference to you or negotiating such a dynamic, and I'm in a charitable mood, I might just smile at you and shake my head. If not so charitable, I'll probably roll my eyes and possibly outright laugh at you.

Arrogance, entitlement, ego, and bravado are not things that engender my submission. Quiet strength, self mastery, and confidence are. I am dominant by nature and strong of will. A man who is more dominant (not domineering!) than I am, and it shows, without his feeling the need to prove anything, is what gets my attention and makes my knees buckle.

If you DO trip that trigger, you'll most likely know ... I will be fairly obvious in my demeanour. I will defer to you, I will often lower my gaze, perhaps sneaking eye contact, or boldly looking you in the eye before looking down in an almost shy manner. I will be of service to you in various ways, even if not actively "serving" you.

If we play, I will accept, and likely even request a D/s dynamic. I will take just about anything you dish out, (within my limits) whether it is something I enjoy for its own sake or not. My pain and/or suffering will be offered up to you as tribute, service, and devotion. I will be grateful for the things you do that I enjoy, and will do my best to earn them. I will obey (usually), and when I don't, I will accept punishment as gracefully as I can. Within this sort of dynamic, making clear the difference between punishment and "funishment" is vital, as I will be in a state of mind and spirit that makes being displeasing to the point of earning punishment truly devastating to me.

When I am fully in a submissive headspace, it's very complete.
I was a fully owned, rightless, Gorean slave for over seven years, and that training does not just go away!

This means that you are my guide during that time, and, in many ways, responsible for me. It is important to remember things like the fact that I will follow the last orders given. If you leave me kneeling and walk away without giving me leave to move about, I will most likely stay there until you give me permission to do otherwise. 
If I HAVE to move (to go to the bathroom, for instance), I will feel as though I have failed and will be genuinely distraught. If we are getting ready to play, and I am just standing or kneeling there (Well, sitting, more likely, these days. I'm too old and crippled to kneel or to stand more than a few minutes now) I am probably waiting to be commanded. If we haven't previously established some routine, then you will need to tell me to strip, to face the rack, etc. I will be cooperative when it is obvious what you want me to do. For instance, I will put my wrists out for binding and such, but if I am unsure, I will wait for orders. I will not be or play dumb, but I will be very pliable and seek your direction, so please ensure that you are ready for such a task before accepting my submission to you for any length of time, whether the length of a scene, a day, or other contractual period.

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As a top:

I will top most anyone who approaches me respectfully. I enjoy it. I will, on occasion, "service top", but if that is what you want, you have to be VERY clear about that up front. If you want a specific scene, tell me so, and we may be able to negotiate that.
Usually though, when I top, I dominate. I am in charge. I won't violate limits, and we will talk in depth about those, as well as potential triggers and such, because I want to make sure my subs/bottoms/slaves are taken care of!
If you tell me you want to serve me, or let me have my way with you, I will take you at your word. That means I will have MY way with you - not your way. Trying to manipulate me into "forcing" you to live out all your kinky fantasies under the guise of "serving" me will not go over well. At all. I am a sadist!!
This means that I enjoy hurting people, and will enjoy your suffering. Your tears please me. So do your screams and pleas for mercy.
Don't worry (too much), I also enjoy rewarding my bottoms with things they enjoy, and making them scream with pleasure as well as pain, and I will likely grill you thoroughly beforehand about your fantasies, likes, dislikes, fears, etc, so that I can fashion a scene geared to make the most of those things for our mutual benefit, but always remember that I'm running the show!
You will find a list of things I am experienced in and enjoy doing to people here.

If you are male identified and bodied
Sex and sexual touching are almost definitely not going to be a part of any play that we do. I am not attracted to submissive men. No, really.. I'm not. No, you are highly unlikely to be the exception to that. There will be no face sitting, blowjobs, handjobs, "forcing" you to touch my genitals in any way whatsoever, worshipping my body in any sexual fashion, touching your body in a sexual fashion, etc. If you attempt to beg, cajole, guilt, or otherwise manipulate me into any of the above, including "accidental", or "not being able to control yourself", it will be the end of playing with me. Ever. Period. (NOTE: Being unable to control an erection or ejaculation is understandable and won't end play. It may give me ammo to TORMENT you, but I won't actually blame you for it!)
The only things I'm likely to do with your penis involve CBT (Yay!).
Being a TV, CD, or sissy does not magically identify you as female for me.

If you are a transman
Most of the above is applicable, except that if you are pre/non op and are interested in having your bits made happy, it's likely negotiable.

If you are female identified and bodied
Sexual play is not a guarantee, but it is extremely likely that it will be negotiable. I love getting it on with hot women and rumour has it that I'm fairly good at it. (BTW, don't assume you aren't hot based on someone else's standards!!)

If you are a transwoman
Same as above, but if you are pre/non op, you should know that anal play is not my thing, and the same rules for penis as for the guys apply.

Playtime, Fun & Service - More of what to expect in my collar.

 This a list of many of the things I enjoy and will commonly expect from you/will do to you.
As you have, no doubt, figured out, if you have read my, "Seeking slaves", post and the "Slave Rules" post, I am, in many ways, very strict, and expect full obedience and service from my slaves.
That does not mean we won't have fun!
As with the rules list, this is in no particular order, for the most part. I am adding things as I think of them.
Let's just get this out of the way right now...
I am a sadist with a very twisted sense of humour! (I have references) That said, I will ALWAYS take great care to avoid doing any actual harm, be it physical, mental, emotional, or spiritual, to my slaves or subs.
I will take great delight in confusing, confounding, teasing, titillating, frightening, infuriating, frustrating, and otherwise fucking with you for my amusement.
I love to make a grown man or woman cry.
It will please and amuse me to make you hate me even while you betray yourself by begging for more, thanking me when it is over, and being eager for the next time.
That said, I WILL NOT leave any doubt as to whether I am genuinely displeased with you. Ever. Period! If you are being truly punished, I will tell you. You will also always know why you are being punished. I may not tell you immediately, and will often make you work to figure it out, because I feel that is more likely to make a lesson stick, but I will make damn sure that it is clear by the end of the day, at the latest. As a former slave, I have been in the position of knowing I was displeasing, and knowing I was being punished, but not understanding what I did/was doing wrong. It is a horrible feeling and serves no purpose, and I will not subject any slave of mine to that!
Now that we have that out of the way, on to more fun (and some mundane) stuff!
Being my slave will not all be fun and games, nor will it always be high protocol. Sometimes I may just want to converse with you. Though we will not converse as equals, I don't want to be stiff and formal all the time either. I like a slave who has his or her own opinions, can hold up their end of a debate, and show me their fiery spirit, all whilst maintaining their proper place as a slave. Show me you can do that, and I will be pleased!
On any given day that you are with me, you may be expected to clean house, move furniture, work on fix-it projects, cook and/or serve me meals, perform for my amusement, massage me, or any number of other things.
When dining, I might seat you beside or across from me and expect you to behave as a conventional dining companion, or I may just keep you at my feet and make you beg or do tricks for scraps, which I will feed you by hand, or toss to you. Maybe you will even eat from a pan on the floor, forbidden to use your hands. As with all things, it will be according to my whim.
I am a rather avid cigar smoker. When I am enjoying a cigar, you will attend me as I desire. That may mean bringing what I require, and then making yourself scarce, unless summoned, or it may mean serving as my ashtray, footstool, and toy, massaging or otherwise servicing my feet, sexually pleasuring me; Or anything in between. You will, at times, be expected to accompany me to cigar meetups, where you will conduct yourself with proper decorum in a manner which will make me proud, and incite envy among my peers, but will not non-consensually involve others in our D/s dynamic.
In fact, that will be true of many situations when you are accompanying me out and about, in non kink situations.
I enjoy things like playing fetch with a slave, or putting slaves in competitive games with one another for the amusement of those watching.
A few things that come to mind:

• Wrestling.. Oil and/or nudity possible.
• Races, with or without paddles, whips, etc as "encouragement"... sack races, 3 legged races, kinky relay races.. All those "kid games", but all grown up!
• Contests of will.. such as seeing which slave can delay orgasm the longest, while other slaves or free do their best to make you lose control.
• Slave rodeo games.

I'm sure I can think of LOTS more!
I have 20+ years of experience in various BDSM activities, and enjoy a WIDE range of things, both from the top and bottom perspective. That means that I am just as likely to be on a rack being worked over by someone at an event as I am to be working YOU over. In fact, There may well even be times that I put a nice, thuddy flogger, or other delicious implements in your hands and direct you to have a go at me until I tire of it. (or until you are genuinely unable to continue without risk to my property). Make no mistake, however... This in NO way alters our dynamic. I am in charge. Again.. my slaves exist to please me, regardless of what it is that may be pleasing to me at any given moment in time.
I do take pleasure in doing things that I know will make a slave happy, so I will definitely make a point of incorporating play or other things that I know you will enjoy. Sometimes I like to surprise a slave with something completely unexpected.
Well.. Okay.. I USUALLY like to do that, but once in a while, the surprise will be specifically calculated to delight the slave.

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This posting is a work in progress at the moment, and will be added to or changed as needed.

Questions and comments, especially ones that might help me make this post more comprehensive are more than welcome!